How I Work

Most of what passes for therapy is two people having a slow conversation about problems. You leave feeling understood. You come back and the patterns are the same.

That's not what I'm after.

We work toward actual change — which means sessions have to do more than process. At some point, you have to practice responding differently. That's what I'm most interested in helping you do.

Early on, I do a thorough assessment of your history — the relationships and experiences that shaped how you respond today. This isn't about cataloguing damage. It's about understanding why your patterns make sense, which is the only honest starting point.

From there, the work varies week to week. Some sessions we're tracing a pattern — where it comes from, what it's protecting you from, what a different response would even feel like. Other sessions we're debriefing what happened when you tried something different in your actual life, and figuring out what got in the way.

Most of what people want to change — anxiety, distance in relationships, the pull toward the same move you know doesn't work — isn't a character flaw. It's an adaptation that made sense at some point and hasn't been updated. That's not a softer way of saying the same thing. It's more accurate. And it opens up more options.

The goal isn't insight. It's something actually shifting in your life — how you handle a conflict, what you do when the familiar pull arrives, how you talk to yourself after something goes wrong. Most people notice something moving within the first few months.